math lecture today was hahahahahhaa really dumb. i came up with my best one-liner for 2005 right there in those plastic green seats of lt 3 listening to joanne lui rattle on about "dee wai dee ex".

Scene: LT 3 Math Lecture
Cast: Eddy Hirono, Miss Joanne Lui

Miss Lui: You see right, differentiation is like peeling an onion...[points to some onion-shaped drawing on the transparency]
Me: [interrupts] YES!!! it makes you CRYYYY!!!!
Miss Lui: it's like you peel the layers off one by one.............
[exeunt]

moral of the story? that if at first you don't come up wif a good joke, try and try again (while incurring the wrath of the whole class), till u come up wif a good one! hahah so proud of myself.

anyway this brings me to the more serious bit of this entry. what am i gonna do after i graduate from university? assuming i make it to one.

yam and i always do this "predict wat our classmates are gonna be in future", for example, we think abel's gonna be a civil servant, zan a lawyer, alps some corporate highflier and jon some gp teacher in rjc. WAIT. isn't he already....NVM hahahaha if u dun get it, ur not supposed to

and i came up wif this possibility for myself. im gonna disappear for a long while, and one day when yam or someone else walks into borders looking for FHM or another one of those "intellectual" reads, he's gonna chance upon a stack of books with gay purple covers and emblazoned across the cover, in gold lettering...."THE ULTIMATE JOKE-BOOK VOLUME 243"....and in small lettering below "Eddy Hirono". then, yam will be so surprised, that he'll flip open the cover and see...

PRICE: $34.95
SPECIAL OFFER: $17.90
MEGA CLEAR-OUT SALE: $5.90
COMES ABSOLUTELY FREE WITH PURCHASE OF "THE ULTIMATE JOKE-BOOK VOLUME 242!!!"

hahaha i really hope i DO NOT end up like THAT. not that i dun wanna write joke books, but if i do, i want them to sell out real quick.

but seriously, my options are limited, and i dunno wat im gonna do in future. wat im interested in seems to be out of reach. journalist? MAYBE. but my writing's nowhere near good enuff. comedian? not funny enuff..plus comedians in singapore who are successful are predominantly chinese comedians, and my chinese SUX. and my dream job, being a tv presenter/match analyst on ESPN Star Sports? well. i've got tons of knowledge on the english premier league, and i sure have the interest but let's just say that they seem to only be interested in you if you're british. think john dykes, andy penders, paul masefield, PJ Roberts, and that dasey guy. and i happen to be NOT british. just half japanese, a quarter chinese, an eighth malay, an eighth thai. PLUS, i dun look as presentable as they do. PLUS, i'm not as fluent as they are when presenting on screen. PLUS, i'd be SOOOOO tempted to slip in jokes during the analysis, like making fun of players' names and stuff, which would really irritate viewers, so this is a no-no too. counsellor/psychologist? though i really wanna be one, it seems IMPOSSIBLE as im not serious enuff, and my life is a mess, how to advise others?!?!

THERE! all my dream jobs. out of reach. too far. should stop dreaming, and start mugging, so that i can get some crapass scholarship which bonds me to some crapass organisation and i get paid to do some job that i really don't want. like i dunno...teach? hahaha possible that i become like a primary school english teacher..and corrupt the young minds of the children..actually not a bad idea at all!! i cud ask to be posted to acs (p) and then i can take REVENGE. [evil laffter]

BUT. im not gonna get to university if i just blog about what i'm gonna do in future. so i shud go mug now.